Saturday, May 05, 2007

The Queen at the Kentucky Derby and Cinco de Mayo

All art by Jack Davis plucked from early MAD magazines - click any picture for a better viewing.

Today is a day of more than one happening. And even combo happenings!

It is Cinco de Mayo Day. Which I thought was the day present day Mexico won its independence. But, I heard something to the contrary, it is something else the Mexicans celebrate this day but I promptly forgot. But, thank Goodness for Google, I quickly became educated:
The 5th of May is not Mexican Independence Day, but it should be! And Cinco de Mayo is not an American holiday, but it should be. Mexico declared its independence from mother Spain on midnight, the 15th of September, 1810. And it took 11 years before the first Spanish soldiers were told and forced to leave Mexico.

So, why Cinco de Mayo? Because 4,000 Mexican soldiers smashed the French and traitor Mexican army of 8,000 at Puebla, Mexico, 100 miles east of Mexico City on the morning of May 5, 1862.

If you plan to Mexican food this day you better go early so you will not have to wait for a long time up front – which we learned last year.

It is Kentucky Derby Day.

All women attending today should wear their finest hat and most pleasing clothes. That is the traditional thing to do.

HOWEVER, this year Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth will be there. It is something she always wanted. So, ladies, you do not upstage the Queen. Keep your finest hats and attire with the beautiful umbrellas in the closet this year let the Queen look the best.

Which reminds me. Long ago, the President of NBC, Pat Weaver, came up with the great idea of putting a chimpanzee as a regular on The Today Show to co-host with Dave Garroway. The name of the chimp was J. Fred Muggs. The ratings shot up.

J. Fred Muggs was raised as a human and had human qualities. And he was always getting into something. It has been reported that Dave Garroway resented that the more people tuned in to The Today Show each morning to see his co-host more than they did him.

But every thing that goes up must come down. In this case the thing up is J. Fred Muggs swinging on the curtains and microphone stands. The Queen was scheduled to be on The Today Show, and “her people” was sent ahead to make sure things were “fit for a Queen”. They said the ape had to go. They did not want a chimp to upstage the Queen.

So, Her Majesty, in her own dignified way, kicked J. Fred Muggs’ ass off The Today Show.

I’m sure Dave Garroway had a twinkle in his eye.

I heard of the news that The Queen has with her a trailer full of hats. So, you who think you can upstage the Queen at the Derby by wearing a fancier hat you won’t. If that is about to happen, you with your beautiful hat might “accidentally” be tripped and you with your hat be wallowing in horse shit.

Just ask J. Fred Muggs.

And – They’re Off!



Blogger kenju said...

I heard on PBS radio today that the queen brought 16 new hats with her to America. Today, she wore a green straw number with a red scarf around the crown. Sounds Christmasy to me! LOL

Did I tell you that I met Dave Garroway in 1962? I wrote about it once. J. Fred was NOT there!

7:16 PM  
Blogger ET said...

No I didn't know you met Dave Garroway. He was a classy act. If I remember correctly, he took his own life.

7:52 PM  

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