Tuesday, January 10, 2006

True almost X-Rated Story

This really happened.

Years ago a person I know just got out of the Navy. He got a job. After working a month or so his boss asked him was he dating. The guy said "No", he went on to say all his friends were married and not many singles girls that age around.

The boss asked him what was he doing for er-needs. The guy said nothing much. The boss suggested a date with a spicy woman named Lolita. He said just don't use his name. And he gave him Lolita's telephone number.

On the upcoming weekend the guy called Lolita and asked for a date. Lolita, with a Spanish accent asked him where did he get her number. He told her he read it on a men's bathroom wall. She seemed satisfied with that answer. She gave him directions how to get to her apartment with on Ponce de Leon, in Atlanta, just across the street form the old Crackers Baseball Stadium.

When he met Lolita the first thing she asked was how much money did he have. He only had about $20. "Is that all?" Lolita asked. Although disappointed she took the money anyway. They went back to the bedroom and got naked and in bed.

Before anything got started good a key rattled in the apartment entrance door and the door swung open. A drunk man was in the living talking to himself and mumbling. Lolita quickly grabbed the person and whispered that was her sugar daddy who paid for her apartment. She told the guy to hide behind the bed. The old man stumbled in and fell on the bed and was mumbling to himself.

Lolita jumped out of bed and told the old man she would be right back. She grabbed the guy's arm and pulled him in the kitchen and opened a door and pushed him through the door and slammed the door. The guy realized he was standing outside on a set of stairs going up and down. He was naked and not knowing what to do.

He went down the several levels until he reached the ground in back of the apartments. He jumped from bush to bush until he got to his car. Back then crime was low and there was no need in locking his car. That was good. He could sit in his car.

But he couldn't go anywhere. His keys were in his clothes on Lolita's bedroom floor.
He sat there trying to figure what to do next, so finally he decided to creep up the front set of stairs, which were on the inside to her apartment. Just what he was going to do when he get there he had no idea.

He got to her apartment, tried the door and it was unlock. The drunk on man did not lock it when he entered. He tiptoed to the bedroom and heard the two of them in bed mumbling. The guy quietly picked up his pants, shoes, and shirt and eased out of the room and out of the apartment. He put his clothes on in the hallway and slipped away into the night.


Blogger kenju said...

That guy sure was lucky!

5:30 PM  
Blogger ET said...

The luck of the Irish-Redneck!

4:01 AM  
Blogger Carolyn said...

That was funny! And yes, he was lucky to get his keys w/out being spotted.

1:12 PM  
Blogger ET said...

The young and foolish can get away with anything.

5:18 PM  

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