Actual Dialog in Doctor's Waiting Room Yesterday

Cell Phone.
Man: Hello?
Man: listens
Man: We are not taking orders today.
Cell Phone.
Man: Hello.
Man: listens
Man: Sorry, we are not taking orders today.
Cell Phone
Man: Hello.
Man: listens.
Man: Can you not understand, we are not taking orders today!

Quote I Just Read On Facebook:

Yes, dear lady, I am drunk. And you are homely.

Tomorrow I will be sober but you will still be homely.

I think that was a Winston Churchill quote.

Overheard at a Fast Food Franchised

Manager angrily (to a kid walking from the back): What are y'all doing back there?

Kid: Having a group hug.