Whoopee!

My aunt worked in Atlanta for a printing company. Next door was a novelty shop that sold things like joy buzzers, card trick aids, little small telescopes that you look in and see a nude woman (“the kind men like”), and other things, which included Whoopee cushions. Then I was in high school.

My aunt brought home one day a whoopee cushion she bought for me. I carried it to school. Two of my friends and I had a ball with it in phys ed. The coach took it away from me.

Later in the day on the PA system I heard the assistant principal call my name and my two friends that were playing with the Whoopee Cushion – we were to report to the office, which we did.

The assistant principal, Lloyd Cox was his name, lined all three up and suddenly pulled his hands out from behind him and squeezed the poo poo cushion and it made its usual loud blasting fart sound. We all cracked up laughing.

“What is so funny about that?” Mr. Cox demanded. We giggled more, but tried to hold it in, which made it even more of a spontaneous thing – the more you try to keep from laughing, the harder it is.

Mr. Cox gave us a long serious lecture and told us we would have to spend that period and the last period in detention, which was a room next to his office.

So, it wasn’t a bad punishment. He stayed gone most of the time and we just got to hang out and talk and cut up a little and go through the drawers of the desks. It was also the room for the counselor’s desk and the truant officer’s desk.

When the last bell of the day rang we got up to leave. Lloyd Cox was out of his office, probably overseeing people leave the campus, to make sure they either left safely or left without trouble, like fights after school happened often. “Meet me after school!” was a common challenge.

So, we were fairly certain we could prowl through his desk and find the Whoopee Cushion without being caught. We found it. One of us, blew it back up and put it on his seat of his chair.

I expected we woould jerked out of class the next day, but in this case, silence is golden - and after he sat down I bet he felt the same. I don't know why our deed went unpunished.