Eyeballing Voice Mails

I have laser eye surgery scheduled next week. The doctor said it will be a minor procedure. She also said almost nothing can go wrong.

It might be minor to her but it is major to me.

Several times through I have been told eye doctors that floaters in the eye are natural but they would like to be informed immediately if any of the floaters have are white or appear to have bright light. One doctor explained that bright floaters could mean your retina is separating from the eye-ball.

We don’t want that do we?

This weekend, on both days, in the in darkness of mornings and the darkness of nights I had bright floaters.

Monday morning I had them again and decided to call my doctor. After all, she said I should notify them immediately in a case like that.
I called the doctors’ office and explained to the lady that answers the phone that I am scheduled to have laser surgery next week but I thought the doctor needed to know I have having bright floaters in the other eye. She listened patiently and even said “u-hum” a couple of times to signal to me that she understood exactly what I was saying.

Then she said, “Hold on, I’ll transfer you to the operation scheduler.” Click!

The operational scheduler voice mail said she was only in the office on Tuesdays and Thursdays and for me to leave a message or call back one of those days. I hung up the phone and called back immediately and told the same lady who transferred me that I did not need to somebody to reschedule the operation, I needed to talk to someone with medical knowledge, I was suppose to notify them immediately if the floaters were bright.

She more or less said, “Oh!” Then she said my doctor is out of the office this week but she would transfer me to the doctor’s main assistant nurse. She did. It was the main assistant nurse’s voice mail. I told her the story and left my telephone number. My call was not returned (that day).

How can you notified them “immediately” as they advised if the system of voice mails does not allow that?

The next day, Tuesday (yesterday), again I had the bright floaters. I worked out in the yard around noontime and got very sweaty. I came in to take a shower and to get ready for the GOBAG (Good Old Boys and Girls) weekly get-together. It was almost 2:00pm.

The telephone rang. It was the nurse just now returning my call from yesterday. “How can I help you?” she asked. I told her my bright floater story, again. She more or less said I had to drop everything and come right in the office. Anna told her as soon as I take a shower.

She said there is no time for a shower, I should come right now, without a shower. “Time is of the essence!” – Sherlock Holmes.

Then she added that once we arrived, because I didn’t have an appointment, they would have to work me in as soon as they could. In other words, be prepared to wait a while.

Hmmm? Me sweaty and dirty and I am to rush down there in a flurry to sat down and wait a while to be worked in? Nope! I’ll use some of that “work in time” to take a shower.

There is a term I heard a lot in the Navy: Hurry up and wait.

Anna and I rushed to the doctors’ office and I was worked in within a reasonable time, not more than 30 or so minutes. The nurse and the doctor had a hard time dilating my eye. I forgot the term but as a layman I’ll say the membrane covering my eyeball was so thick and hard it was hard to get a solution through to dilate the eye.

I told Anna I had a better idea. Why not just turn out the lights and just sit there for about ten minutes? By then, my eyes would have naturally dilated to adjust to the dark. That makes sense to me. I wonder why the experts haven’t thought of that?

That reminds me of the BP trying to control the uncontrollable oil gushing in the Gulf. They flew in the top engineers to try to figure out a way to stop or control it, and spent millions of dollars doing so.

From pictures he had seen a plumber saw the problem and figured out a solution. It was just a plumbing problem, I guess. Somehow the plumber was able to contact the right people to listen to him and now, it appears, it is under control, thanks to the plumber.

Do you think he will get a lot of money for solving their problem? I bet not. BP said who is to say they wouldn’t have figured out that themselves in time. But, I bet the executive who allowed the plumber’s idea to be tried gets a big bonus in the millions.

The doctor that saw me could find no sign of the retina parting from the eyeball.

All’s well that ends well.