My friend Paul who replaced the support poles holding our den up last week – his mother died Thursday. She was 90 years old.
Last night we went to the funeral home and paid our respects. Funeral home visitations and funerals are for the living. This was no exception.
It was like a high school reunion. Many old friends I haven’t seen in over 45 or years and others I haven’t seen in a good while. I am always amazed at the guessing game we play at times like this, trying to recognize who that person is hiding behind all those wrinkles and gray hair with mustaches and beards.
The voice is always a quick way to recognize people. The voice tone does not change. The accent might, but the same note tone is still there. Another sure thing is their demeanor. If they were cocky then they are cocky now. If they had a sincere way about them then they will now. And the pretentious phony has not changed his phoniness – just more hanging skin.
One old lady talked to me as if we are the best of friends and acted if we last talked to each other earlier this week. She said my nickname “Rock” so natural… either she is in a time warp or I am. I faked it. I have no idea who she was.
One old friend surprised me. I ran into him at another funeral about ten years ago and he had changed dramatically since the last time I saw him in the early ‘60s. In the early ‘60s he was short. When I saw him at the funeral in the mid ‘90s he was tall and looked like a person very concerned about his looks and worked out daily. Now, his age is catching up to him and he looks like he might be losing bone density, he doesn’t look as tall as then, and believe it or not, it is like he is regressing back to the way he looked in the early 60s.
Seeing old friends of 4 or 5 decades ago all in the same room is always is a little traumatizing to me. Do they expect me to do something crazy like I would then? Now, sometimes a witty comment is all I can come up with. I don’t even know what to talk to them about, but I still enjoying seeing them, probably our of curiosity.
I can only hope I will regress to how I looked in the 1960's!
ReplyDeleteI agree with what you said, except I don't live where I used to, so I don't get to see my old schoolmates at funerals, only family. That is where name tags come in handy, but I guess you can't ask people to wear name tags at a funeral...LOL
Judy,
ReplyDeleteYou are right, name tags would have made taken the guesswork out of it.
LOL to Judy! I've been to funerals where it seemed the deceased needed a nametag.
ReplyDeleteIt's the same in my family. Funerals are the only time families/friends see each other and can catch up.
Carolyn,
ReplyDeleteYep. Funerals is the socail twirl of the community.
Sometimes a witty comment is the best antic one can come up with.
ReplyDeleteSuzanne,
ReplyDeleteYep, cheap too.